I knew I was going to be late today. I knew it when I decided to shuck my routine and eat my cereal before my bath. I knew it when, while in the bath I decided it might be a great time to shave my legs. I knew it when I decided that, since I’d shaved my legs, I might as well slather myself in body lotion too. I knew it when I realised I had nothing clean to wear and therefore had no idea what to throw on. By the time I watched long-hair-good-arms walk past the window there was no denying it, and as I walked past impeccable-suit pretty much outside my frontdoor I sped my walking pace up to an almost-run. Or at least, as close to an almost-run as heels will let me. Only SJP can run in heels, and I swear to God that girl’s ankles can’t be human! Have you seen some of the shoes she runs in?!

By the time I passed miserable-frumpy-girl I think I must have made up some time, though, as she was only about 200 yards further down the street than usual. And I was in work for 8.56am – only about 10 mins late. (I don’t start until 9am, but like to be in at 8.45 to make tea, check emails, check blog stats, etc.)

The miracle of this tale is that, despite the almost-running, my ankles are in one piece – heck, they don’t even ache! And in my Bertie platforms too! I was beginning to worry that my ankles would never again be strong enough to wear heels, but it seems they have fully healed! Hoorah for the wonder that is the human body!