One of my “break up the day” treats comes in the form of the Karen Millen enewsletter. I like to coo over all the pretties I can’t afford and add items to my search list for ebay. On the days KM doesn’t drop into my inbox, Reiss, net-a-porter or my-theresa inevitably do, and the same pattern applies…
Yesterday, while scrolling down the KM emailing I noticed a logo at the bottom of the page. Horror of horror (or joy of joys, depending on your outlook), Karen Millen online now accepts PayPal.
This may not seem too big a deal to you. You’re probably cool and calm and in charge of your finances. I, on the other hand am a bit of an emotional, somewhat frivolous shopper. It has taken me approx 10 years to learn that plastic does not equate to fake money. And no matter how hard I try to convince it otherwise, my brain simply won’t register that PayPal money is real.
This is just one of the ways in which I persuade myself that a purchase is justified, I actually have a whole arsenal of justifications ready to whip out at a moment’s notice. So I thought I’d share them with you here. Feel free to add your own to the comments. (Because a problem shared is a problem halved… and I can always use more inspired ammunition!)
1) Paypal money isn’t real.
Yes, despite the fact that those numbers have pound signs in front of them, I can’t get it through my brain that they have any real bearing on my bank balance. So, my most regular justification for anything ebay related is “There’s enough money in my paypal account to cover it.” This is closely followed by “There’s half the cost in my paypal balance, which means they’re practically half price!” Uhuh.
2) It’s only xx hours of freelance…
This is how I ended up buying my purple cashmere coat and my Dune shoes, through liberal application of the phrases “They’re only the equivalent to eight used car features” and “£xx – but that’s only 40 blog posts…”
3) I’ve got a wedding to go to this year.
Being 29 this excuse is pretty much permananetly true, and has been since I hit my mid twenties. Many of my friends are hitting marrying age, and where they aren’t, my siblings, step-siblings and the older of the 40-odd cousins I’ve somehow accumulated are getting hitched instead. I’m working on an average of three weddings a year at the moment (my next is in May).
This usually works in favour of a new dress. The problem is that I have a few dozen lovely dresses, many of which are too dressy for any use other than a wedding, and yet have never been worn…
4) But they will go perfectly with that dress for that wedding I was telling you about…
Usually relating to shoes. And a dress I have at least two pairs of shoes to match already.
5) I’ll get loads of wear out of it – we live in the UK!
Most often heard in the coat department, whether winter cashmere or spring lightweight trenches. Can also apply to cardigans, the British girl’s best friend.
6) But I don’t have one in that colour…
As above, use in relation to coats and cardigans.
7) It fits perfectly!
For those who struggle to find clothes that fit right this is the perfect excuse to buy that pair of jeans that feel like they were tailored for you. For those who know what fits and suits their shape and attempt this plea for every vintage prom dress in Brick Lane it’s really not such a compelling argument.
8 ) It’s pay day!
Only works twelve days a year. Unless, like me, you have two jobs!